Long Story Short ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Murder Oh it's always a good morning when you wake up with voracious wine head. A terrible decision was made last night and I will pay for it all day long. But, on the up side, at least I did not pop a hole in my colon last night. Listening to someone chew carrots through a thin cubicle partition is, um, bad. Especially when it's the fourth day in a row of Carrot Fest 2005 and, oh yeah, did I mention the WINE HEAD?? Professor K's birthday is rapidly approaching and so far I am on track. I have a tidy little list of gifts to buy him and already two of those gifts have been ordered. Go me! However, I found the one thing that I want SO bad and I know he wants it too. Would it be unbirthday of me to buy it for myself? He knows I want it , I don't think he'd blame me. It's this. He tried to get it for me for my bday but somehow couldn't get his hands on one. Now it's sitting there all shiny and blue with the regular season fast approaching and HOW CAN I BE EXPECTED TO ROOT PROPERLY WITHOUT IT??? HOW???? There's a naked lady's anus on a banner and it's distracting me from my verbiosity. My verbiage. My diet Rock Star energy drink. Fucking snaggle tooth whore in the cafeteria asks me, every single time I buy a diet Rock Star energy drink, "You gonna party like a rock star?" Oh, HA HA HA, funny lady. Can I bash this giant can into your face now? There is, in fact, a reason why I drink caffeine in the morning. It keeps me from killing people. And so if you happen to run into me before the caffeine has gotten into the bloodstream you better watch the fuck out. Especially if I have perhaps imbibed a sup too much wine the evening before. I cannot be held accountable for any murders I might commit. Tra la la. Update today people. PLEASE! If you have any love for me at all, update. 9:11 a.m. - 2005-08-18 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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