Long Story Short ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Yankee swap anxiety I was suffering from Yankee swap anxiety and thank God that's over! I hate the Yankee swap. The whole concept of spending $10 on a random gift and then receiving something of equal or lessor value that I don't want, and possibly having that taken away for an even less appealing gift...can I ask: what's the point? How about pizza and brownies and that's it? We just had our HR Christmas party and when I read the invitation it said that bringing a gift was optional. Apparently I was the only one that opted out so I didn't have to get up and open something stupid. I had a great time, though, and we laughed a lot so I guess that's the point of the swap - not the gifts themselves but the laughter involved. I remember a Yankee swap I went to in college with the ex. We smoked a crapload of weed before we went and then chowed down on the free food. After food it was time for the Yankee swap and I think both of us brought random crap from the University bookstore that we paid for with our parents' account receivable cards. It was bad. So we ended up sitting on the same chair because there was no space and laughing till I thought I would die. One girl, Candace, got lip gloss early on as her gift. Clearly not understanding the rules of the swap she stuffed her finger in it and removed a huge glob and smeared it all over her lips. Later someone swapped out their gift for hers and we giggled in anticipation. Minutes later the new owner of the lip gloss bothered to open it to see how it smelled and then quiety muttered "this has been used" before glaring at Candace. We laughed so hard that we were crying and had that ow-stomach feeling and were trying desperately to stop because people were looking at us funny. Especially our boss. Later on that evening Candace, the extraordinarily countrified mama's girl who wore kitty cat sweatshirts and long denim skirts, was doing something way too close to me and stumbled and almost fell on me. The look of sheer terror on my face got my ex going and then we were both in full on hysterics, so bad that we got several other people going. We must have laughed for ten minutes at top volume while my boss attempted to keep the party going. But in all honesty she was distracted by the giant tub of cashews that had been one of the gifts. Another party to go to...gotta run. 2:14 p.m. - 2004-12-16 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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