Long Story Short ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the dress I'm slap-happy with the entries today. But my mood is kickass right now. I drank gallon after gallon of water today and that always pumps me up in a way that coffee really can't. Coffee makes me spastic and nauseous but oh how I crave it! Water is just gooooood, going down like fresh air. Yum. It makes me hafta pee. Nightmares! Ever since we moved I am nightmaring up a storm! Crazy, unhappy, scary nightmares. Like my parents and I getting caught in a terrorist attack sort of nightmares. Professor K has been having them too. Really vivid realistic type shit. I can't remember if I had any last night. I think I kept waking up, anxious as a...well...as a mother about her baby. I was all wound up about leaving Bailey alone today but I think it was also going back to work and moving on with my new cohabitation life. I was lying in bed trying to sniffle quietly while I cried for the pain in my heart - that kind of sad, sick feeling when you're about to burst. Professor K heard me and did such the right thing - he just rolled toward me and put his arm on my stomach and said things in his deep voice. Not trying to solve the problem, just validating that I was sad and that most likely everything would be okay. I guess I'm the sort of person that needs to hear that every now and again. Currently I am on alert for the phone to ring - Professor K should be home with the fuzzies soon and he's going to give me a Bailey update. Is she frantic and peeing herself? Or normal happy-to-see-Daddy Bailey? I hope it's the latter but fear it's the former. Whatever. By the way I can NEVER have children. If I experience this level of anxiety over a little dog how will I ever cope with my own tiny flesh and blood? I will fall apart into a million sobbing pieces. Well, enough about that. I'll be leaving very shortly and can hung my bunny and kiss her snout and hold her until morning. Why do I love her so? She's like a hypnotic little monkey. God, am I lame about my dog or what? Let's see...I feel like there was other stuff to write but am now blank. OH YEAH! The bridesmaid dress arrived last week. I waited until last night to try it on. All I have to say is "ugh". The dress is an attractive style in theory but the skirt poofs out WAY farther than I thought and I'm not feeling the color at all. It's very gold-ey and I'm very pale and have never liked the way I look in metallic shades. It's very tight in the waist (thanks to my recent stuff-everything-in diet) and too big in the shoulders. Can I get it altered before the 26th? Let's freaking hope so. Anyway, a big letdown overall. But I keep telling myself it could be lime green, it could be tight in the hips and short (my nightmare), it could be strapless, it could be two sizes too small. Right now it fits but very tightly. If I lost five pounds it would be a lot less uncomfortable. I'm getting my hair done tomorrow at a new salon, by a new person. I'm excited but also nervous - my typical "I hate salons" mental jig. But I feel good about this one because the woman comes recommended and that always helps convince me. Plus if she already has a friend of mine as a client it will give us that background connection that I am always lacking with stylists. I just want my hair to look pretty and styled again, not flat and pathetic and not quite blonde. I just got my emailed invite to an HR dinner at some chinese restaurant next week. To go or not to go...that is the question. Some very serious-looking guy just came in and started measuring my desk. He said to me "stick this against your back wall please" as he handed me one end of the measuring tape. Umm...okay. But how about a smile Mr. Poophead? It's hump day, poker night, date night and I can't wait to get home!! But you know, it was actually really nice to be at work today. I was going a little mad from domestic duties, being out and about is really a nice feeling. And it's a short week for me and a looong weekend! 4:29 p.m. - 2004-09-01 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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