Long Story Short ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kittens We're going to look at kittens tomorrow! They can't go home until next week or the week after, but how fun is it going to be playing with four 6-week old kittens, trying to decide if one should join the family? Unfortunately the one that we both liked right off the bat has already been adopted. But there are three more, one white with gray ears and paws (my 2nd favorite) and two all black ones. I have nothing against all black cats but it's not really the look I was going for. Bailey is a golden blond woof with black-eyeliner ringed chocolatey brown eyes, delicate black eyebrows and eyelashes, a black nose with half-inch long snout whiskers, and a stylish purple collar. Her tail is ridiculously long and waggly and her chest is barrely, but she's still a small dog - between 30 and 35 pounds. Beautiful, really. I don't know a prettier dog. Okay, I'm biased, I admit this. But I want a kitty with similar interesting details. Different colors in his fur, interesting eye color, stripes or spots or patches of color - anything to make the description of his little body involve more than "black fur, blue eyes". Am I shallow? Probably. And honestly, if I really liked the kitten and it was black I'd still take it home. Professor K doesn't seem biased against black kittens and he knows I like the white one, but this little boy is going to be living at my house so I'll probably be allowed to make the final decision. Plus I'm apparently "the dominant one", according to him. I've been having definite second thoughts about getting a kitten, but I've been having second thoughts about a lot of things lately. I read my horoscope for today and it said something that struck me - that I'm in a "fog of doubt and worry" right now. And that actually applies because I've been all caught up in my head thinking about my relationships and my life. I feel weird about the transfer of focus from my ex girlfriend to Professor K. I think I temporarily forgot, or deluded myself into forgetting, that he and I have only known each other for a month and a half. And that, just like with my ex, our relationship will develop and grow as we get to know each other better. And that as we do that there are going to be things we don't like, or that we need to talk about that aren't fun. I'm not sure where I stand with the ex at this point. She called me twice at work today - one time I was away from my desk and the other time I asked someone else to pick up and say I wasn't here. She also sent me an email, and left a message on my cell phone. Based on all of these things I know that my analysis of our phone call was pretty much off. She says she was really tired and stoned, and that her new girlfriend was there so she really couldn't talk. And I now have to respond in some way that is productive and positive, but I'm exhausted just thinking about that. I said this to Professor K the other night and it's so true: I cannot have two serious relationships at once. And even though I never see her she constitutes a serious relationship for me because of the strength of emotion that I feel when dealing with her. Is that unfair of me? Do I owe her my friendship based on years of history? Seriously none of my other friends stress me out like that, I've handpicked them pretty much based on their ability to NOT stress me out. I will probably call her later tonight and be alright with how she was on the phone and wish her well and talk about a possible kitten and not talk about my boyfriend, and it will all be back the way it was before. Because seriously, when it comes down to it, I don't think I have it in me to write her off if she doesn't want to be. Sad but true. And tomorrow, playing with kittens! Whether we end up with one or not I can't wait to be around tiny balls of soft fur, sharp little claws and teeth, and tails that stick up straight in the air. Mew! 3:49 p.m. - 2004-05-14 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
|
||||||